Painful
by Wishing I could Delete this
Summary: -And I knew this was finally the end. So close, so terribly close to seeing Edward again. He snarled, ripping the chains from the wall. "I'm going to enjoy killing you, Bella."  B&E. Under revision
1. Only the Beginning

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

I've failed to update any of my accounts, and post the re-edited version of painful, for that, I am sorry. Thankfully, this was still saved in my document up loader. (:

* * *

_It'll be over soon, soon everything will end._

The words were an echo in my mind, beating against my brain in constant beat that consumed my every thought. End it. It made so much sense; everything fit into place. I had to set him free, I had to show him how much I loved him and release some of the pain. It wasn't optional.

My fingers shook and I closed my eyes. I couldn't bear looking around the meadow; I wouldn't let myself see the horror of what I was doing. I hesitated, the knife positioned dangerously close to my lower stomach. I could almost feel the cold metal of the blade.

_What am I doing?_

A new thought entered my mind, fighting against my desire to end. Something stirred inside of me, slowly waking to life; it felt like a war against my mind.

_Do it, now._

My hand jerked forward, without warning, and brought the knife with it. I gasped with the pain, shocked at the reality of what I had just done. I trembled harshly and the knife cut wider, breaking my skin like I was made of warm clay. My head began to spin and I fell to my knees, grasping at the blade's handle and pulling it out of my body.

Everything was wrong, horribly wrong. I couldn't remember how I had gotten here; I didn't understand why I stabbed myself. I was confused, I tried to focus on the last few days and got nothing but haze and blurred images.

I breathed in deeply only to choke on the air and collapse further as my lungs seized together. Blood rained down from me, trailing and spiraling to the ground in crimson droplets. My mouth tasted like copper pennies and the red liquid was warm and burned my tongue. I spit it out and it landed in splatters on my hand.

I wanted to call for help, to plead for survival and beg forgiveness; but my head was dizzy and my limbs felt dead and heavy and I knew nothing and no one could help me. The cut burned in fire and radiated a throb in ripples that covered my entire body.

"Bella, Bella!"

Words tangled in the air, tripping over themselves in the rush to be said; my name vibrated in the air and I drank them in as much as I could. I was dreaming now, I supposed, because my name was spoken by my angel. I thanked God silently for sending him to me, allowing him to deliver me into death.

"Bella, no honey; you need to stay awake." Edwards tone was frantic and terrified. It hurt me more to hear him sound like that and I wanted to soothe him, but I couldn't form the words.

"What happened? Who- why did- Bella… I can't- are you?"

I had to see his face, but my eyes wouldn't open, my eye lids felt so heavy as if they were made of stone.

"I don't know." I pushed the words out of my mouth, through clenched teeth and cracked lips.

"Edw- I can't… I don't know." I tried to explain, "Please, believe I- I didn't want, I'm not-"I paused to attempt a breath.

"Didn't want what? What happened, believe what?"

And suddenly it all made sense to me; in my near death state my life clicked into place and the answer was so clear, I understood exactly what happened. The revelation sent a rush through my body and I jerked my eyes open. The world was smeared together and patches of my vision were black while others were unimaginable hues. I searched for Edwards's face, unable to clearly see him.

"Edward! You have to find it." I urged him to understand, "You can't join me until you do it, Edward. Promise me; promise me you'll stop this."

"Find what Bella? Tell me what you need me to do, I promise you, but you need to tell me!"

"Her. Stop it, stop this, it's happening. You can't stop until it's safe. You can't stop until she's gone. I can't- I can't, I lo- I love" I choked on more of my own blood and the cut off of oxygen burnt in my body, decaying my mind and sending my limbs into twitching spasms. Keeping conscious was getting harder and harder to do; my mind began slipping between the reality of pain and a numb float. .I struggled harder to stay alive, to stay awake until my mind cleared, until I could finally breathe again. One second, two seconds, three seconds…my brain reeled and everything faded away.

* * *

2018: Nine years later

"You have to eat, love."

Her voice was a constant torment to his mind; drifting in and out unexpectedly and for varying lengths of times. She could be with him for a year, or stay only a fraction of a second, whispering and coaxing before vanishing.

"Are you real this time?" He asked, closing his eyes and resting his head on the desk in front of him.

"You know the answer to that love," she whispered, regret merging with her usual sad murmur. I nodded, expecting the answer.

"How long are you staying this time?" Edward sighed, flipping back open the book in front of him and tracing every word with his eyes. It was is sixty-eighth time reading it and knew it was helpless, there was no new information, nothing hidden between the words.

"Time does not exist for me," She sang. "I am here for the length you require me." It was the same every time.

"Tell me what I'm supposed to find." Edward begged. He turned his neck to stare at her. "Please tell me what you- what _she_ meant."

"We've been over this before, love." She closed her eyes and frowned. "I do not know who, nor do I know what is happening… I cannot help you."

"Then leave, please. Leave forever and do not come back." He sobbed, falling to the ground. "Your not her… your not her!"

"You promised," She responded angrily. "You made a promise and you need to fulfill it, and in order to do that you must remain strong and therefore you must hunt."

"Leave…Leave…Leave." He muttered, head rested against the floor. "Leave, please."

"I was never even here to begin with, love."


	2. Because they're all at fault

This is the brand new, re-vamped version of this story. I hope you will agree with me, it is a million times better than before. Grammar, spelling, plot, character development… all of it. There will be major changes, most I hope you will like. Thank you for your extreme patience.

I hope all of this re-editing doesn't confuse you.

* * *

Chapter two:

_Because they're all at fault_

He can feel them. Always hovering, always waiting. They've expected him to break, to crack, and to run into death with open arms. They're partially right, he's broken. He wants to join death, because there really wasn't a point in living. If this was considered living, anyways.

Mainly, he existed.

Not because of any desire to, but because she had begged him to. Because he had promised her .He would give his Angel her last request, even if that meant an eternity of pain, searching for his answer. Searching for what she asked for, searching for why she-

The thought sent a crippling fire down his spine, seizing up his muscles and piercing through his skull. It was a painful thought. He had worked hard, after years of being balled up in a hole, unable to process life around him, to keep a wall in that side of his brain. Of course he remembered her. Of course every memory of her was burned deeply inside his mind. Of course her smile, her blush, her eyes, her hair, her laugh were engraved behind his eyelids. But he could push them back. He had built the wall to protect himself from the pain, so that he could do as she asked.

But it was consuming. It drained him. His heart had not that ability and with every passing second, the hole inside his chest ached. It ached and thundered and roared with anger. It demanded her return, it begged for her.

He craved her warmth; the radiated heat that felt like fire under his freezing fingers. But he had killed that light, that pure heat. He had taken her from the mortal world, just by existing. Had she never meet him, she would have grown old and gotten married and had children. She would have lived.

But she had met him, and she had died. She had taken her own-

Pain riddled his body.

His roar of anguish filled the entire room. It was the second time he'd let the thought nearly surface and he could not bear it a third time.

He knew though, he'd had his suspicions. There were signs. But he ignored them, or rather, he hadn't been able to read them correctly.

The distance between them had grown. He could have prevented everything, but she's rotting away under the earth. It's his fault, and he knows it.

But he isn't alone.

She thinks it's her fault. Of course, he'd never blame her, but it's in her mind. She has the sight. She can predict the future. Yet she hadn't. She was so sure, so positive, that Bella would be one of them, she no doubts about her brothers future, but she was wrong. She had made a mistake. She was the only chance of saving Bella, and she had failed.

And she still failed. Even now, after her death, she was failing. She was no closer to finding out what Bella was trying to say than Edward was, and every vision she had ended in a thick black fog.

But, no one could blame Alice. Not when Jasper new it was his fault. Because while Edward had his suspicions and Alice had not seen, Jasper had know. He had felt the pain that radiated of Bella. He knew of the anger, of the despair. He had shared in her misery and confusion. He had tried; he had calmed her a little and kept a constant string of good energy her way, but he had told no one. He had not confronted her. He kept silent, and his silence had played a hand in her death. While the others had not prevented it, he had aided it. But while her death hurt him, ate at him, kept him full of guilt, the knowledge that he had been the one to take away his loves best friend killed him. To watch, slowly, as his angel withered away in unhappiness burnt the flesh from his bones. To watch everyday as a bit of Alice, a bit of the woman he loved, die.

Because he had not suspected, he had know. Yet he did nothing, and even now, he does nothing. He sits, and waits, and hopes that it will get better. Because she was only a human, just a silly human that had impacted their lives, but hopefully she would fade away, and his Alice would come back.

But he knew that was false hoping, because he could feel everything. He could feel the scars she'd left behind, and they were the kind that could never fade.

The scars that tore Esme into shreds, The type of scars that had her questioning her own existence. She had lost a child, a baby, and that had sent her into a swan dive over the edge of a cliff, but she had lost a daughter now. That loss was irreversible.

Even though she has no extra supernatural powers like Alice, or Edward, or Jasper, she thinks she could have done something. Because she was a mother once, still is in a way, and she has an intuition. She could have used it to save her human daughter. She should have known, but she didn't.

But if she was a _real_ mother, she would have known her daughter needed help. And even now, if she was a real mother, she would be able to fix her family.

She would be able to comfort them in the mourning. Not Edward though, Edward could never be comforted. He had the half of his soul, and there was no recovery, no love that Esme could give him that would fix it. But she could help Alice, her poor Alice and Jasper. She could help Emmett.

Emmett, the one who took her death the most unexpected.

How silent he had grown; caged off in his own world, undisturbed besides the call of his wife. They know though, that Bella had been a sister to him. Perhaps she reminded him of his real sister, the one who had died years ago, when Emmett was still human. Regardless of the resemblances, the loss felt doubled with grief. Because he can't really wrap his mind around it. Bella had once been his, at least a part of her anyways, she had been apart of his family. But now she belonged to the earth, to the heavens, to the world.

But he didn't like it. He didn't like the thought of her under ground, rotting in a coffin, her face iced and white. He didn't like that she was being devoured by worms, crawling with maggots. He prefers to think of her as alive, human and warm and all clumsy feet and blushing cheeks. But him imagining her being alive didn't make it so.

Because he doest not like the thought of her being dead; No, he does not like it at all.

So he's adopted an attitude more like Carlisle. Because Carlisle is like his father, and he wants to be strong.

But he doesn't know that Carlisle is just like him.

He doesn't know that Carlisle, the man who deals with death daily, has been so shaken by her loss. He doesn't know that Carlisle, who has accepted the circle of life and has every belief in God, has been questioning everything he thought he knew.

For Carlisle, to see Esme weep, to see Edward as merely a shell, to watch a blank Emmett and a crumbling family ruins him. He can't face them. He can't face the reality of this situation, so he works harder now. He's always at the hospital, always saving lives. It's his way of repenting for the one he couldn't save. For the human daughter that he'd loss.

He misses her like his own, yet he does not think about her. He allows his family to think about her, he lets his family mourn her, because he is trying to avenge her death. She will be the motivation behind the life he saves, because she was the missing member. Because it took them almost one hundred years to find her, but it'd taken less than two years to loose her.

He would spend the next one hundred years saving everyone possible, making up for the one life he couldn't save, and the one he wish he had saved the most.

Rosalie Hale Cullen, was a different story. She had felt no great loss at Bella's death. In fact, she had smiled just a hint. Of course, she felt guilty about the smile, but she would be lying if she said it was a real loss to her.

Now, however, Bella's death brought her deep sense of sorrow. Not, however, for the dead human girl, but for her ruined family. If she'd admit it to herself, and she never would if Edward was around, she blamed Bella. Bella had been selfish in her death.

She had given herself up without thinking of the consequences to the Cullen's, and for that, Rosalie could kill her herself.

And even now, in the after life, Rosalie was still envious. I was always envious, Envious at the impact the human had made on _her_ family. Envious of how easily she had died. How simple it had all been. A blade to the stomach and_ walla, _instant death.

She wishes it would be that simple for her. Because while Emmett is her life, and she couldn't bear the thought of ever being without him, she's been ready to die since her first eternal breath.

Her thoughts suddenly dip for the worse and a thinly veiled insult about Bella wells up in her brain.

_I'm glad she's-_

She cuts it off just in time, thinking about the pattern of the couch. Focusing intently on the couch. Thinking of nothing but the couch. She hears Edward shift upstairs, and knows that he hadn't been focusing. He hadn't caught the almost thought. She feels relieved, but also angry, angry that she has to censor such normal reactions.

And upstairs, upstairs Edward feels the same.

Angry, so terribly angry at the wall he's re-building around his memories. He should be able to sit here, curled in anguish, reliving every single nano-second of his time with his angel.

He should not be forcing himself to reread books upon books, helplessly searching for a clue, any sort of clue at all. But he has to. Because the sooner he finds what he needs, the sooner he does what she asked him to do, he can join her.

He made a promise, and he intends to keep it. But afterwards, he will go gladly into the arms of death. Because hopefully, he prays, God will take pity of him and allow him one last look at his Angel.


	3. Something you've forgotten

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

Impressed? That's three chapters in one night I've edited. Wow, the changes are so incredible. This feels like a completely different story. I'm really hoping you all are enjoying the new version as much as I am.

There is a very, very big difference between 13 year old me, and 17 year old me.

Please forgive all the little errors, in my excitement to publish this, I might have- most likely did- overlook many small mistakes.

* * *

_Chapter Three:_

_Something you've forgotten._

"Edward… you've gone without hunting again."

She was back. She always came back when he'd gone without hunting. He wasn't sure if he did it on purpose to see her, to hear her voice. But each time left a gaping wound in him. As much as it hurt, he lived for these moments.

"I've been busy." His answer was short. He always answered short. She would take the time to coax the words out of his mouth, and he would enjoy it because it meant she stayed longer.

"Would you like me to leave?" She asks, picking up a book. She looks so real, so perfect. He can't understand how she can move things, how she can be here. Because this is an exact replica of her, down to the light strawberry blush hinting on highlights of her cheeks.

_Lord,_ he thinks, _she is gorgeous. _

"No." But his tone is harsh. He's not sure anymore. He needs these visits, he needs her to push him, but they consume him too much. They strip what little progress he makes of being able to simply think. So as much as craves seeing her, he wishes she'd leave.

"You're not getting anywhere." Bella sighs. She's always sighing. The sound chills him. He never heard his real Angel use such a tone and it scares him, yet reminds him she's not real.

"You- _she_ didn't give me much to go on. I've no idea what I'm looking for." He growls. She smiles in response. It's not the real smile, not the one that catches his breath and makes him dizzy with love, but its close and he can feel his muscles tensing. That smile always brings around pain. Everything about her brings pain.

"You already know that answer." She teases. He's immediately on his feet, staring at her. Most of the time he avoids direct eye contact and watches her from the corner of his eyes or from reflected surfaces. She's more glorious than he was able to comprehend.

"What do I already know?" His voice was begging, pleading for an answer. Two decades and she had never said something close to that.

"I can't tell you what you don't know… I can only remind you of what you've known all a long and chosen to ignore."

"I need more than that, please."

And then she was beside him, and he was taking a wobbly step backward. Her arms reached out and her fingers brushed the hollow of his cheeks. He was gasping for air and trying to stop from shaking. Her fingers trailed under his eyes as they fluttered closed. It was all so reminiscent of the time he first declared his love, the first time they were at their meadow.

"Don't forget to hunt, love." He could feel the breath of her words, mere inches away from his face. His eyes flashed open and she was gone.

A sudden fury overtook him. His body went crashing through his room, shattering anything his hands could touch and breaking anything he could find. He heard his family in the door way, watching, again. They stood silently, waiting. This had not been the first time. This would not be the last time.

One minute passed. Two minutes passed. Three minutes passed.

And then he was curling himself into the fetal position, knees clutched at his chest. His family left, one by one, trying and failing to keep their thoughts to themselves.

…_./…._

Hair as red as crimson blood matched a vicious set of eyes, cold and hollowed as they watched the girl in front of her. She'd be lying if she said she thought it would work. Even after all of these years, she expected it to fall a part. It had been an amazing plan, extraordinary, really, but it would never have worked. She had luck on her side. But really, she always had luck on her side. Finally that luck had proven useful; she had picked the right _subjects_.

But it had been almost easy. Convincing Bella to "commit suicide" It was a risk, but she knew Edward needed to see the body, needed to feel Bella drained of life, however much of an illusion that was. Everything was perfect, everything but Alice. She didn't have the ability to shield herself from Alice's powers and had to rely on hiding in the scent of werewolves. But it was dangerous and she'd almost been caught.

This time, her plan had been precise. No Volturi involvement, no unplanned deaths. Just a handful of _selected_ humans for a rare chance of having an ability; torture, of course, to show that ability, and execution if it wasn't useful, But she had luck on her side, like she always did. Luck was her gift, and it had given her exactly what she needed.

It gave her the illusion of Isabella Marie Swans death. And from that, it gave her the ultimate revenge.

It was so much sweeter this way. Edward, believing that his true love was dead; and Bella, unbeknownst to him or anyone else, being tortured daily. It truly was the best form of revenge. Because Victoria would never die, and now, neither would Bella. She'd seen to that.

Even as a vampire, she was useless. Constantly weak from lack of blood and torture, she was now eternally damned to a life of endless torment. And if there was one thing Victoria never grew tired of, it was tormenting her.

She'd like to think that she would eventually escape. She use to pray that Edward could feel her, alive, somewhere. But she doesn't think those things anymore. She could no longer keep onto that vein hope. Trapped with her captures, staring into the eyes that seemed to glow with the fire of hell itself, she could no longer hope.

Because if Victoria wasn't pushing her to edge of death, the brown haired boy- who she'd never seen without a cigarette between his teeth- would take her place. And then there would be flames. Flames that crawled along the edge of her skin, tasted the dirty remains of her tattered clothes, licked at her face and burnt with hatred.

But her thoughts were interrupted at the voice of someone.

"Time for a bit of fun, Bella." There's a girl with black hair, and her face is split into a wide grin. It's a beautiful smile, but it does nothing to mask the intense loathing in her eyes. Bella tries to look away, but she's caught in those horrifying eyes.

For a brief moment she remembers the honey brown eyes, staring at her in complete adoration. But then a feeling of a knife is dragged down her chest and the only scar on her body, the one that led to her "death" begins to burn. And the last thought she has is of those eyes, and a name.

Because while she doesn't remember much of her human life, or anything before the red headed woman and all of the pain, she does remember _him._ Vividly, colorfully, wonderfully. And she knows, they must have been in love, because the place where her heart should be, aches whenever his image pops into her head. And while she can't be certain of everything she's remembered, she knows for a fact that it's Edward Cullen, because he is the one thing that's keeping her alive.

And while she used to pray that Edward would save her, she now prays that after the next torture session, she'll be able to just remember his name.

* * *

Feel free to comment or leave a question.

Feedback is very much appreciated. I'd really like to know what everyone thinks about my changes as a writer.

Again, I hope you've enjoyed.

Look forward to the next edited chapter. I will not be posting anything new until everything has been edited.


	4. Breaking the Wall

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

And, another chapter fixed.

and again, sorry for all the confusion to those reading for the first time and for those who are reading it for a second.

I hope this is not a let down. Please, tell me what you think.

* * *

_Chapter four:_

_Breaking the Wall_

It's been weeks, months, years, decades. Time. He's used too much time; the one thing that had never been in short supplies, all of it is gone. He's gotten no where. Not really. And he's still searching, still trying in vain to figure the obscure puzzle Bella had left him to deal with.

He takes a breath, and then another. It's unnecessary, but it calms him down. And then there is throbbing. A large amount of throbbing that racks his brain and curls him back into a ball. He retreats from the pain, like a wounded animal being kicked. It's useless. He's built his wall too strong, closed himself off for too long. The mere idea of reliving the last- the final time she- it's like having his soul shredded in front of him.

But he has to do it. Because there might have been a clue. There might have been something he overlooked, but he doesn't know. He can't know, because it is the one memory that overloads his mind and leaves him in a burning haze that will not clear. He knows what she asked of him, but that much is all.

Bella had told him he already knew- or his subconscious had told him he already knew- either way, it was the only clue he had. Reliving the memory would surely kill him, but at least he would die trying to fulfill his promise.

And then he's breathing again and gripping tightly to the arms of a couch. He's not actually sure where he is at the moment. He knows its somewhere in Europe. But he can't even remember the room he's in.

"Jasper, I need your help." He whispers it, but Jasper has heard him and is ready, waiting beside him. It's the least he can do, regardless of how excruciating it will be.

"You can do it, Edward. Bring her back, bring her forward." His voice is calm, smooth, but his mind races as he attempts to get his body prepared.

Wave after wave of calm is being drained from him, as Edwards's body hungrily grabs onto the feelings. He falters for a moment, but continues.

And then the feelings are gone, replaced by a horror that Jasper has never known, could never dare to feel. His mind reels and his body shakes and then he's falling and he knows that someone has caught him, wrapped him in a cold embrace. He knows its Alice, he can smell her, but he cannot see her because the pain has become too vivid and even the back of his eyelids hurt.

But Edward is going through worse. Much, much, worse.

He's like a stone on the couch, a stiff statue of perfect anguish. But he is no longer in this world, he is reliving something more terrible than death itself.

And the memory of what feels like a billion years ago, and just yesterday, has consumed him.

She's broken. He can see that in her eyes. He stumbles through the meadow like a puppet, confused, frightened. He can smell her blood and instead of thirst, he feels fear. Because he can see something reflective and sharp sticking out from her.

And he's by her side, holding her. Her hair is curling slightly and it forms a dark halo around her paling face. He's calling her name and begging for answers, but she simply stares. And oh, her eyes are so glorious. He's lost in them, so deeply lost in them that he can't focus on anything else. The world has ceased to exist because her eyes are there and staring into his and he swears he can feel his heart beat.

But she's urging him. She's speaking words and he's so lost in her, in the horror of what is happening, that he can't understand.

"You have to find it!" She's hysterical, shuddering. He holds down her arms, trying to calm her, but nothing is working to control her shaking. "You can't join me until you do it, Edward." He's confused, angry, frightened, shocked. But those don't describe the emotions, because they can't fully describe his feelings. There are no words. No thoughts. It's black chaos and fear inside of him.

"Promise me; promise me you'll stop this." Fear, the main thing coursing through him. A dark, deep, uncontrollable fear. It swallows him whole and all he can do is promise. All he can do is swear and promise and agree, because he'll do whatever she wants him to do. He'll rocket himself to the moon to bring it down, he'll climb into the heavens and bring her back her own set of wings, he'll pluck the stars from the sky and give them to her like diamonds.

But he needs more information, and he needs to hear her voice. Because as long as she kept talking, she would still be alive. So he asks and her response is weak.

"Her." Who? "Stop it, stop this." He doesn't know. "It's happening." What's happening? "You can't stop until its safe." Until what was safe, But he can't ask her because she's choking on her words, and he knows what she's about to say. She's about to say she loves him, but her mouth closes and it's never finished.

Her body shakes once, twice.

And then she is limp, dead in his arms.

He never thought of turning her. Why hadn't he bit her? Why hadn't he stopped the bleeding, called Carlisle and taken her home. He let her die, in their meadow.

But it doesn't make sense. How had Bella gotten to the meadow without him? He followed her scent after impatiently waiting at her house. But the scent had been too fresh, she never would have made it there.

The thoughts break him from the memory and suddenly he's gasping for air on the bottom of the floor. His mind is on overload and he can faintly hear people yelling, crying, and wailing in the background.

But he can't understand and he still can't see anything. So he opens his eyes and there is still nothing. Everything is distorted and blurry, like he's peering through water. So he blinks. It doesn't help and he lifts his hands to his eyes and brushes. Something soft, warm, wet is pooling at the tip of his finger. But he doesn't understand.

Because vampires don't cry.

Because he hasn't shed a tear in over a hundred years. Because if he could cry, he would be dried up, shriveled to the bone.

But then again, vampires don't have souls.

But hadn't he just had his ripped in half again, just moments ago?

Yet those thoughts are expelled from his brain, because his wall is down now and there is no stopping the onslaught of memories.

And once again, he's pulled under, into a world that feels so much better than this one, one that almost seems real.

…_./…._

_Bella making a wreath of daisies, tying knots in the green stems and smelling the flowers. She's wearing a dress, which is rare, but he doesn't want to comment on it incase she'd feel self conscious and never wear one again. But he wants to, so badly, compliment her. He yearns to make that beautiful blush dance across her cheeks. But the sight of her, content to pluck flowers and weave them together, is more than enough. _

_She's smiling and humming. Her voice sounds like the faint murmur of a stream and a warm hum from a dancing wind. Edward feels rather foolish about making such a ridiculously poetic metaphor, but it's true. _

_She tilts her head over to him, to the love of her life, and closes her eyes. It feels good to be in his presence and when her eyes are closed she can imagine them a little more equal. _

"_You're something out of a dream, Edward." Bella is still humming. He feels inadequate next to her glory and shakes his head at her misperceived vision. He's out of a nightmare. But she- wonderful, gorgeous, radiant, Bella- she's a goddess turned mortal, fallen from the arms of God himself, foolishly allowing him to be near her. _

_How can she not see that?_

"_I-" suddenly his words are stuck in his throat. Thick rolls of emotion are pooling inside of him and he doesn't know how to express them properly. He's never had the problem before and it sends tingles into his palms. "I- you-you've…and I..." He gives up forming words and instead looks at her. _

_In that look he shows her how much he loves her. He can't hold back the look in his eyes, the absolute worship. _

_It makes her blush and he can see the soft pink spreading down her chest. _

"_I know." She responds, because she's like that. Because she gets him. "I know." _

The memory swirls.

_She looks thin and he can sense the frailty of her. Edward doesn't understand, because she's been eating regularly and there's no threat to her life. He blames it a little on Jacob Black, because their broken friendship had killed a little part of Bella. Edward tries not to push it though, because he's simply happy she's in his arms, in their meadow. _

_All sense of worriment leaves his mind as his angel looks up at him and smiles. It doesn't touch her eyes, but he's too focused on the words that are coming out of her mouth._

"_I love you, always. Forever." _

The picture transforms.

"_I tried to reach the meadow more than once." Bella admits curled into his lap. His entire family is downstairs and they are trying very hard not to listen in. She's either forgotten how good of hearing they all had, or decided it didn't matter if they heard. She had no secrets from the Cullens. _

"_I was so sure, so completely positive that if I could find it, that I- that I would understand. That it would be a clue to find you, at the very least I would feel better there." _

_He's not entirely sure of what to say. _

"_Bella…I" she cuts him off._

"_It took hours, of hiking, days of tracking it down. And now, even though I'm completely positive of its location, it would take me…an entire day. Don't worry, I'll never wander the woods without you. It would take far, far too long."_

_He's relieved by that. Because he couldn't bear loosing her now. Not after-_

His mind releases him and the shock comes suddenly. He's furious with himself. Disgusted in his own stupidity.

"How did she get to the meadow?" His words are a snarl and his entire family is watching in silence, immediately understanding.

"She was in the meadow two and a half hours after leaving our house. I was on my way back from hunting with Carlisle. I'd waited at her house thirty minutes… and then I was at the meadow. I- I followed her scent?" But it didn't feel right. There was something missing, how had he been able to follow her scent if she never went home? But that was a question for later, because the main problem was laid out.

"There's no way she could have gotten there on her own."

* * *

The next chapter is on its way, almost completely revised.

Is it silly, how extremely happy I am to be revising this? It feels like a broken toy I had when I was little, but now that I'm older I'm able to fix it and have it at its finest.

I had to restrain myself from using many smiley faces.

But, I don't think one would hurt...

(:


	5. The beginning of Time

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: So, it's been a while. Sorry about that.

* * *

_Previously: _

_His mind releases him and the shock comes suddenly. He's furious with himself. Disgusted in his own stupidity._

_"How did she get to the meadow?" His words are a snarl and his entire family is watching in silence, immediately understanding._

_"She's was in the meadow two and a half hours after leaving our house. I was on my way back from hunting withCarlisle. I'd waited at her house thirty minutes… and then I was at the meadow. I- I followed her scent?" But it didn't feel right. There was something missing, how had he been able to follow her scent if she never went home? But that was a question for later, because the main problem was laid out._

_"There's no way she could have gotten there on her own." _

_Chapter Five: _

_The Beginning of Time_

One minute elapses.

Two minutes...

Three...

There is no movement, no breathing, no thought.

Four minutes...

Five..

Fury. _ Rage_. Cold and brutal animalistic wrath erupts like a tidal wave from the occupants in the room. A burst of loathing blinds Edward and he can no longer function.

And then there is screaming.

No one hushes him, no one tries to calm him down; they drop, as if in unison, to the floor. Comfort cannot be found in one another and a mutual fury still bubbles in each.

No one can speak.

They listen to Edward, listen and _feel_ as Edward curls in upon himself, shaking and hollow. They do not allow themselves pity, there is no room to feel pity. They have lost and they have grieved a death, a death which deserved revenge and not acceptance.

They have betrayed a member of their family and they have left down another one. There is no time for pity or self sorrow. There is only anger and rage and a trembling pain that courses through all.

Twelve minutes.

Thirteen hours.

Five days.

Time does not exist for the species damned to the eternal death.

Hunger gnaws at their veins and throats scream in agony, but those feelings are eclipsed in rage.

Eventually one stirs- Emmett.

His perspective has altered and after five days of allowing misery and wrath to encompass all of his being he isn't sure of the world anymore.

"B-Bella."

Alice is next and her voice cracks.

One by one they stand and the feelings are subdued, if not contained. Five days were not enough, not by a centuries length, yet there is work to be done.

Edward stirs last and pushes himself from the floor, broken pieces of wood splinter under him but he doesn't notice. His family allows him privacy and then he is left alone in an unknown room with nothing but his thoughts.

And her.

"You figured it out."

He can't see her, but he can hear her. Edward nods and opens his mouth to speak, but nothing can escape his lips.

"What happened to me, love?" She asks, and her voice is a whisper in his ear. She's so close to him, closer than he dares allow her and he flinches from the beauty of her voice and the horror of the question.

"You died." He croaked.

"Did you see my body?" She asks.

And then his eyes snap open and she's Bella. She is his completely and totally, and he can reach out and touch her.

"You need to stay awake now. You can't hide away in the pain anymore." Her voice makes his spine tingle and his throat close.

"Did you see my body, Edward?"

"I held you in my arms, for your last breath. I carried you to your house, to your father...I watched the morticians take you away."

"Where did I go Edward?"

The room goes cold.

"You went- You went.. away.. I watched as you were lowered to the ground."

"Why did you let them take me away? Why did you let go of me?"

"I- I don't know"

"Where am I, right now?" She asks, and her voice has stretched into a haunting echo, as if she shouldn't be asking that, as if it caused her pain to say the words.

And the tremor to her lip proves that she's in pain.

"Your in Forks. Your body is in the ground."

A small smile twists at the corner of her mouth and Edward is leaning forward, reaching out to her.

"Am I?"

and then she is gone.

* * *

Little taste of whats to come.


	6. shall shortly be revised

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight :(

Alrighty peoplesss... I'm sorry I haven't updated anything forever, but school's almost out and I'm going to be a freshman next year and I'm really busy. I will try as soon as possible to keep updating, sorry everyone.

* * *

&()&()& Start of Chapter &()&()&

**Bella's Pov:**

The walls were unusually gray this morning, the stray beams of light that had taken a custom to hit the inside of the barren cell seemed to lack its shine. A small light bulb was flicker, waving back and forth from the ancient stone wall ceiling.

"Hey puppet" the brown haired boy sang, spitting the cigarett out from his mouth. He didn't bother stamping out the glowing ash.

"Would you like to play for a while" He smiled, teeth shinning in the dark light. It was all a sick joke to him "Play time", more like torture time.

"Rodrick" The shrill voice of the black haired girl yelled, her tiny frame sha- shaying threw the heavy door with a pitcher in her hand. She looked beautiful, careless, though a menacing gleam in her eyes.

"Don't you ever listen to Victoria? She sired you after all" She tuttered, swining open my cage doors "Little Bella needs to have something to drink?" She turned to look at me, handing over the pitcher "Doesn't she?"

The brown haired boy sighed, flicking another cigarette into his mouth, snapping his fingers, a flame appearing on his thumb. After lighting his cigarette he blew out the flame, glaring at me.

"But i'm bored" He complained, sounding very much like a three year old.

"Amerilla, Rodrick? Are you down there?" A voice called, entering into the chamber.

"What do you want Victoria?" Rodrick asked, annoyed.

"Taliass is getting a bit to worried about the girl, I think we need to set her straight" Victoria said, her bright crimson hair shinning. "Just give her the blood, Amerilla, and Rodrick get the hell out of here. We don't want her to die, do we?"

Amerilla nodded, smirking as she handed me the blood, and left. Rodrick threw me one last glance before sighing and following Amerilla out of the room.

"As for you" Victoria said, turning toward me "Your just lucky i'm so kind"

It didn't feel like she was so kind, torturing me day and night. Making me kill myself, killing thousands of other humans, turning them in vampires until she could find one that would bring me back. I think I had been dead for a total of about four days before she finally brought me back. I don't know though, it was so long ago.

I sighed, scooting closer toward the wall. Holding myself tightly with my left arm, I grabbed the pitcher with my right, sniffing it first. It was another game, called poison Bella. They liked it when the deadly viruses would cause me to go sick, I actually vomited, like I had food in my stomach. Sometimes I did, Rodrick thought it was a real laugh when they forced me to eat human food.

It seemed safe, taking a drink though, I regretted it. It was human and was heavy with liquor, it was almost sour, and made me pucker my lips up in disgust. But I drank it greedily, getting over the taste, It was blood, and that's all I cared about.

"Why?" I whispered, looking up toward the sky. "Why?" I repeated to myself.

A bird was nearby, singing in the trees. I could hear the soft thump of its heart, and the little tittering newborn babies chirping nearby. The wind began to pick up, and the scent of a hundred different animals filled my nose, making my nostril's flare. It all smelled so good, the wind, the grass, the freedom.

I pushed my shoulder lightly into the stone wall, hoping it would budge. It didn't. I hadn't inherrited the super human strength i figured, I could barely rip the chains off my wrist when I was a new born.

With one last sigh, I closed my eyes, letting my head roll onto my shoulder. At least I wasn't being beaten today, and any day where I wasn't, was a good day. Well, for me at least.

* * *

Alice Pov: On the way to Volturi

Pushing the button to the seat, I reclined back wards, closing my eyes. Esme's warm hand clasped over my own, a small smile playing at her lips. I smiled back. She wanted me to be happy, knowing that Bella, my dead heart went into pangs, was still alive.

"Thank you mom" I whispered, turning the air conditioner on. The wind blowing at me. I had a weird love of the air conditioner, it was one of the only things I loved anymore. "I love you, you know that right?"

Esme nodded, her smile becoming wider.

"I know Alice, I know" She assured me, catching my eye before looking back out the window, and at the country side flying by.

"It seems like so long, doesn't it?" I asked her, needing to talk. She sighed, tucking a loose strand of her curly carmel colored hair behind her ear.

"Yes, Alice, it feels like a life time"

"do you think Haziel is really telling the truth?" I whispered, even though she was in a different car. I saw Jasper change positions from the corner of my eye, his eye lids fluttering close.

"Yes, honey, I do" Esme said, staring back at Jasper.

"Don't worry Mom" Jasper smiled from the back " I'm feeling nothing but pure honesty from Haziel" He said firmly, unquestionably.

"Thats good" I muttered, putting down the sun visor, flipping on my sunglasses.

"We'll be with Bella soon" Esme sang, placing her hand on Carisle shoulder. "We'll be a family again"

The sun started to leave, sinking below the mountains of green. I could faintly hear the violins of singing crickets in the dewy grass. I relaxed, letting the warmth -of the knowledge Bella was okay- warm my heart.

"Soon" Jasper grinned.

"Soon" I echoed.

* * *

Edward Pov: In volturi

I stepped on the accelerator, urging the car forward. I took no note of speed signs or cross roads or anything else. I kept my eyes transfixed on the road, my mind on Bella. I surge of butterflies erupted in my heart as I thought of her, of my Bella. I let the tips of my lips curl into a smile. Thinking of her.

I was hopeful, maybe even more then I should. I knew though, if this ended badly, I wasn't going to survive. I am not going to get over the blow if it turns out she-

I can't even think of it.

Grasping on the strands that she was alive, I put my whole dead heart on the line. Risking in breaking three times. I would do it this time, I wouldn't be able to survie.

The little speed montior it went to 130, I pushed a little harder on the gas. Lurching forward, we went flying across the open country. I only slowed as I saw the great gates, protecting the hidden city, begin to sparkle in the dying sun.

Two days.

That's how long my family had known.

Three days.

That's how long I had known.

Soon.

That's how long until I would see her, until I would hold her in my arms. Soon.

Veering off to the left, I skidded to a halt by a shadowed sidewalk, leading directly into the alley way. I was out of the car before anyone else, running threw the alley.

"Wait" Carisle called, finally catching up. I wasn't more then eight yards from the entrance to the main castle.

"Yes?" I asked, tapping my foot impatiently. Carisle sighed, running his hands threw his hair. I concentrated on what he was thinking, waiting for the rush of thoughts to enter my head.

_Hold_ _don't want_ _rushing bad leave please?_

I strained, trying to put the words together. The thought was incomplete, words missing. Brushing it aside, I leaned against the stone wall, waiting for my other family members.

It only took a few seconds before everyone caught up, Haziel slacking behind a little. A lot like Bella-more butterflies rose- when we last came to see the volturi.

If I had only killed Victoria in that clearing, with Seth, in the Newborn battle, everything would be okay. But I didn't, I had let her slip away.

Pushing the thoughts away, I strode into the castle.

* * *

Aro Pov:

I dug my fingers into my hair, pulling at the unbreakable strands of powdered white. It was maddening, confusing, and very irritating.

Cacuis swept down the stairs, his cloak billowing in the wind. Taking his spot by my right, he held out his hand, waiting for me to take it.

I growled, slapping his hand away.

"What is wrong brother?" He asked, tilting his head in fake confusion.

"You know what is wrong" I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest. He laughed, his head throwing back a little. Slanting my eyes at him I stared until he stopped.

"Are you not amused?" Cacuis asked, smirking slightly.

"No" I answered stiffly.

The doors opened with a clang, Jane hurrying in, Alec behind her. Unconsciously, I felt my lips twitch into a smile at the sight of them both. I doted upon Jane, loving her dearly.

"Aro" Her childlike voice cried, rushing forward. "The Cullens are here!"

I let the smile I had grow into a grin, Carisle would know whats going on. He was the braniac, the one with his nose in his books. He would figure everything out. He had to.

"Bring them in" I laughed, motioning toward the nearest guard to our chamber doors. He nodded, turning to face the doors and opening them.

"Carisle" I greeted my old friend, spreading my arms open for a hug. The young blond vampire smiled at me to, It still suprised me to see his eyes the topaz color they were two hundred years ago.

"Aro" He greeted, walking toward me.

"This must be your family" I mentioned, surveying the other Cullens. I rested my gaze on Edward and Alice, envious of their talents.

"Yes, my wife Esme" Carisle introduced, pointing toward a brunnett who was attractive. I nodded approvingly, smiling at her in warmth.

"Emmett, Jasper, and Rosalie, and of course you know Alice and Edward, and this is Haziel" Carisle pointed out everyone. I stiffened, now just noticing the human heart beat.

"Another human pet?" I laughed, looking toward the mortal girl. She wasn't as pretty as the other one, Bella i recall her name was, but Bella was a more classical type that not many could compare to. I knew she would be a beautiful vampire.

"Where is that darling Bella? I remember a promise to turn her" I reminded them, a joke of course. Bella was already a vampire, Fredrick something, another of my guards, had been sent to check on her around 50 years ago.

The family stiffened.

"What?" I asked, narrowing my eyes.

"She's..she's-" The little pixie Alice began to tremble, I stood confused.

"She's actually why we are here" The human spoke up, surprising me. I glanced over at Edward, noticing his rigid posture and clenched jaw and fists.

"Well, what is the problem? Did she run away, i'm afriad I have quite a few other very important things to do..." I trailed off, studying their reaction.

"She's been captured" The human, Haziel, said "98 years ago"

I frowned.

"Well, then why are you coming to me now. Besides, a vampire can't just be captured, chains wouldn't keep them in place, and I doubt anyone has enough power to physically hold her down for 98 years"

"Victoria could" Haziel persisted.

I disagreed.

"She's in alliance to a vampire that has the power to control, mental and physical"

My ears perked up, listening intently. Control? I didn't like the sound of that, there could be an uprising, and in our state we couldn't afford to deal with a little skirmish, how could we deal with a war?

"Look, we just need your help finding her" the blond girl sighed, flicking her hair back "Can you help us out or what?"

I rose my eye brows, smiling at her forwardness.

"Rosalie" Emse scowlded, frowning at her "daughters" rudeness.

"Yes," I agreed "But first, Carisle, I need your help"

--

End of chapter.

Yes, I left you on a cliffy.

sorry that I haven't updated in forever. I've just been really really really really really really really busy. I guess you all know what that is like, right?

Well, read and Review. It really helps when people review!


	7. August is the deadline!

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight :(

A/n: Sorry I haven't updated in forever. But I'm really trying. Just remember, feed back really really really helps. So you should review and make me smile.

I'm putting off a MAJOR vocab test for you all.

Enjoy.

* * *

Start: Chapter seven

I flipped threw another book, the dust particles swimming in the air. There was absolutely nothing useful in any of these. It was practically impossible to find anything in the ancient coding and classical structure, it took a good two hours to read threw anything, let alone understand it.

Patience had never been a strong point for vampires, especially when your used to reading whole volumes under minutes.

"Nothing?" Alice asked, running a hand threw her short spiky hair. I pinched the bridge of my temples. That was an understatement.

"Nothing" I repeated, shaking my head in frustration.

"me either" She sighed. Slamming the book she was previously occupied with, she let it drop to the table with a large thud. I winced as more dust assaulted the air.

"Shall we take a break?" Alice asked, already getting up from her chair.

I growled.

There wasn't time enough for a break, I needed to find Bella!

"Alice, we can't." I snapped. It was rude and cold but I needed Bella. I needed to see her, to hear her, to touch her. I couldn't wait any longer. It was physically impossible for me to wait any longer. The need was to great, the desire to strong. I had to have her back.

"Edward, you just need to relax! we'll find her soon. I-"

"No" I silenced her "Soon is not soon enough. Now. I need her now, and if the volturi wont help until we help them, then we have to hurry! Alice I can't, I have to find her. I have to Alice."

She nodded slightly and sat back down, she quickly picked up a different anciet text book and scrolled threw it.

_understand. am Edward, I know painful this for you. But soon, feel it. worry. _

Ignoring the jumbled thought I dove back into the task at hand, praying that Bella was okay. That she was safe, that she wasn't being hurt. Unintentionaly my hand tightened at the thought, she better of not been hurt.

Victoria. I would hunt her down until the end of the world, until she was dead. I wouldn't stop, not until she no longer contaiminated the world.

'_Edward' _Carlisle called out to me, his mind a little more clear then Alice's. _'come. Aro. talk. Study. now.'_I cracked a small smile at Carlisle's attempt to make his thoughts clear.

"Aro would like to see us." I told Alice quickly, already at the doorway to the massive library. I didn't wait for her, I flew down the stair cases and straight into the entrance hall.

It took a second longer then I anticipated to find Aro's personal study. It was in small turn off from the initial meeting chambers. I pushed the doors open and waited for Alice to join me. She caught up a half a second later then me and walked in first.

The room was large and open, a wooden desk graved intricately was place in the center of the room, book shelves aligned the walls and the rum red curtains were drawn tightly around the windows.

Aro was sitting behind his desk, Carlisle occupying a chair near him. Jasper was at Alice's side, putting a protective arm around her shoulder. Emmett stood alone by a large golden globe looking aggravated. Esme and Rosalie weren't in the room. My guard was up instantly.

"Good, you've arrived" Aro smiled brightly, gesturing for me to take the chair oppisite of him. I looked over to Carlisle, he nodded slightly.

_'yes.' _He told me mentally. He was trying to be very clear with his thoughts. _'don't worry. no danger. sit.'_If i were able to smile, I would have laughed. Carlisle was trying to be as primitive as possible, thinking in only short incomplete sentences. He didn't realize that it wasn't the words he used, but the pace and quickness.

I would have to tell him that.

Hesitantly I made my way to the chair and sat down silently. I tried to turn into his thoughts, but his mind was a blur and I couldn't concentrate on anything.

_'Edward? You Hear Me?' _Carlisle asked. I nodded quickly, it going unnoticed by Aro or the rest of my family. _'Good.'_Carlisle responded. I looked back into Aro's mind. Nothing..

Maybe i could hear Carlisle's thoughts because I was so accustomed to his mind, and not Aro's. I quickly tried to read the rest of my family. Jasper was to confusing to understand, Emmett was thinking to fast for me to dechiper what would have been easy to understand, But I could understand Alice fairly clearly.

"Did you and Alice find anything?" Aro asked. Noticing the concentrated expression on my face. I erased my face of any emotion and shook my head no.

"There was nothing relevant to the case at hand." I answered back formally.

"But you can still hear thoughts. Correct?" Aro asked me. I nodded back yes. A slight glimmer of jealousy crept into his face before he replaced it with a tight smile.

"And can you Alice, still see the future?" He question my sister. Her annoyed face was answer enough, she had stopped having visions the day Haziel came.

"Jasper?" He asked. "Are you still capable of reading others emotions and manipulating them?" Jaspers nodded like me. He was still able to read emotions. Only slightly though, and he could barely calm anyone down.

I didn't feel the need to mention that to Aro.

"And how about you? Are your gifts still working? or any other member of your guard?" Carlisle asked. '_You. Read. Aro. Thoughts. Can?'_ I glanced at him. The slight movement in my head told him that I couldn't understand any of his thoughts.

"Unfortunately. I lost them a day before you arrived, most of my guard lost this morning or last night. I'm most confused on how your dear sons have kept there gifts."

"Maybe it's possible that only the old are being affected." Alice pipped up, entwining her hand with Jasper's. My chest cracked a little, Bella.

"It doesn't seem likely, as Jasper is nearly the same age as most as the guard. Only Edward is younger." Carlisle responded wistfully. I didn't pay attention. Bella. That was my main goal. Her, Isabella Marie Swan. No, Isabella Marie Cullen. That sounded better, more then better, it sounded perfect.

"We think that the absence in our powers are because of Victoria, who has taken Bella." Jasper said, changing the topic. Aro was becoming to curious on how Jasper and I kept our gifts.

"Yes, Bella. I do wish to see her again. It would be such a treat to see how she's turned out. I imagine that she's very pretty, and what gifts she has...." Aro trailed off. "It is such a pity that she hadn't joined our guard. She would have been such a pleasure."

I could barely contain the strangled growl in my chest. She wasn't pretty, she was beautiful and magnificint, never in her life will she ever be anything less then gorgeous.

"Yes, well" Carlisle cleared his throat, seeing the strangled look on my face. "She was kidnapped just around 98 years ago. After her death, she was well, brought back." He explained. Aro raised an eyebrow.

"Apparently, Victoria was able to change a vampire who could bring people back from the dead. Victoria had Bella kill herself, and then brought her back to torture her. Victoria had a group of about six or seven, but Haziels says there is only three or four now."

Aro turned to the rest of us, shock clearly written on his face. He studied each of our eyes, looking for a suspicious factor, anything to make Carlisle's story un true.

"But it would be physically impossible for anyone to hold down a vampire, let a lone a newborn. It just couldn't be done." Aro disagreed. Carlisle nodded, a frown forming on his face.

"Your right Aro," Carlise agreed "But among Victora's followers, there is the ablity of control."

"I see" Aro replied, running a hand across his chin. "And what do you think I could do to help you."

"We need your help locating her. That's all, we know you have guards almost everywhere, and without Alice being able to see the future to find Bella, we need your help finding her." I told him quickly.

The old clock on the wall ticked by a few seconds while Aro paused to think.

"Yes, I will help. I shall aid you in your quest to find Bella and even help kill Victoria. But I insist that after Bella has been returned to you safely, you shall return and visit."

"We shall" Carlisle answered, glad that Aro was going to help.

"Good." Emmett said for the first time. "Because after Bella and Edward reunite, If Bella's already a vampire, I don't want to be within one hundered feet of them and a bed." he joked.

Emmett and Jasper burst into a fit of laughs, and Alice giggled softly. I let the corners of my mouth try to lift up, but they wouldn't budge. I couldn't smile, not until I saw her. Not until I could hear her, not until she was in my arms and safe.

That day would come.

It would come soon.

I knew it.

* * *

Okay Everyone. Please review. It really helps, you have no idea. :)  
So click the green button. You can't miss it.

The guys who run this site made it HUGE! Haha.


	8. contempt

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight:(

A/n: Hi, I've finished this chapter in record time:) not....

and to answer one of my reviewers, they made the review button at the end of the page big, so people could see it better. I hope that answers your questions. Lol

I hope you like it.

Enjoy.

* * *

Start: Chapter Eight

"So what's the plan?" Rosalie asked, tapping her fingers along the table in frustration. Her blond hair was pulled up messily and she had a dirt stain on the corner of her shirt. A small frown twisted her lips downwards.

Aro chuckled softly, too softly for anyone to hear. The Cullen family was amusing him more then he thought they would. The beautiful blond never seemed to stop being annoyed or bored, the muscular man seemed to be her complete opposite and he was a clown of sorts. Alice was a simple pleasure to watch move, she was more graceful then most vampires, and had a bubbly personality. Jasper, Alice's mate, was calm, more so then any vampire he had ever come across. Esme had a sort of maternal instinct to her, and cared for each one of them deeply.

But it was not the same, they did not act as they should have been acting. They're expressions, and moods, the way they carried themselves or spoke, it was all different from the memories that Edward gave him. He noticed that Emmett, while still clownish, was not at all as merry and happy as he should, and Jasper was slightly fidgety and more protective of Alice then anything. Esme seemed to be almost sad every moment of the day and night. Even Carlisle was different.

Edward was the same as Aro had known him. Brooding, guilty, and his face always held some type of anguish and pain. Aro had only met him two times before, once he was asking for his death, and it took no mind reader to understand that he was a broken man. The second, he was so incredibly concerned and guilty for the girl he had held protectively in his arms.

And then there was Haziel. Aro didn't have the slightest clue as to why the human was traveling with the Cullens, nor did he care, but it was slightly interesting.

And still further, if Bella had been captured, why had they waited for so long to come to his castle for aid? Bella was indeed a vampire, that guard whose name he had forgotten, had checked for him. _Fredrick? Rick? Rodrick? Yes, Rodrick was the vampire. He had the ability to control fire_. Aro thought back.

It was a shame to let him go, but it wasn't like him to hold a vampire against his will, unless of course they had violated a law.

"Yes. Aro has sent word to his guards, and all of his contacts are being asked for information." Carlisle said calmly, adressing his blond daughter.

"Word should be getting back either tonight or tomorrow, it's unlikely that we wont find them." Demetri said, standing to Aro's right. Felix was at his left, and another body guard was stationed behind his chair.

"If we do not retreave any information, Felix and Demertri shall be leaving the next day in search for Bella." Aro added in.

"Thank you." Esme smiled at Aro, it not reaching her eyes.

"Not a problem." Aro nodded, waving off her thanks. It wasn't a problem in truth, if this Victoria character was responsible for the loss of the special abilities, then it was like killing two birds with one stone. At least with the Cullen's added help, the job would be done faster, and maybe one or two of them would die, making they're clan a little smaller and more weak.

He was hoping for the blond and Alice. The blond, although amusing, was irritating, and Alice's power would be a problem in a future war. _'It's a shame that she wouldn't join us'_Aro thought bitterly.

"Do you really think that this Victoria character is the reason we've lost our talents?" Aro directed the question at Haziel.

"Yes, Yes I do." Haziel responded firmly.

"Well then, Let us hope that word comes back soon, I'd very much like to meet with her." he sighed and folded his hands over his lap. It was such a human trait, but he couldn't seem to break the habit of crossing his hands over his legs.

"If that's all, I'd like to retire to my room." Rosalie growled at got up from her chair, she didn't wait for an answer and left the room quickly.

"I better go get her." Emmett muttered and followed his wife out of the room. The rest of the Cullens politely excused themselves and followed after the two.

Haziel left slowly, ignoring the irritated look Felix gave her as she made her way across the room. He had liked Bella better, she was much more pretty and fun to watch.

"I shall send word once I receive any." Aro called after them.

xxxxxxxx

The lights where off, but he could everything in the room clearly. The thick cover on the royal size mattress was crooked slightly, a red tassel hanging off a embroidered pillow case was falling off. The curtains that covered the windows had wrinkles. Eighteen of the many books in the room were sticking out slightly in front of the others.

A fly was on the ceiling, crawling and searching for an escape from the room, moving dangerously close to the moving fan.

Edward ignored the fly and moved toward the bed. It was useless to have it, completely wasteful, but it was comfortable. It reminded him of Bella, of the times they spent holding each other in her bed in Forks.

His chest ached painfuly and he threw the thought out of his mind. It was the only way to keep moving, not thinking about it. Not allowing himself to feel.

Jasper had said he was like a block, not feeling anything. But he couldn't really sense his feelings anymore, so it didn't matter what Jasper said to him.

He couldn't let himself remember or think of any time besides the present. If he relived the so many wonderful memories he wouldn't be able to make it, he was sure of that.

Someone moved in the other room, changing clothes or rustling paper.

He didn't care. The people next door to him were not important, they were insignificant, and they didn't matter at all, they were like the fly.

No one cared, no one besides Bella.

* * *

Hello.

Sorry that this chapter is so short, It's really just a filler chapter to get to the next part. I promise that the next one will be better.

Good news though, I've already written the ending and that's a plus. Thank you to everyone who has been so patient and followed with this story, it means a lot.

Don't forget to review.

Please and thank you:)


	9. The answer is

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

A/n: Wow, I haven't updated in almost a year, that's a little insane. I'd just like to say that in the year I've been away I believe I've really grown as a writer. While I still may be suckish and horrible, I'm much better then the little thirteen year old I was. My spelling and grammar may not have improved, but me actually taking the time to re-read and proof my work has made up at least a little bit for all the errors. Though, I must warn you, I'm still rather awful with the whole business. So please, forgive my mistakes and hopefully the empty space in my head will one day be filled.

Enough of this Author's note,

_On with the story_

* * *

_Start: Chapter Nine_

Vampires are losing their abilities.

The thought seemed slightly silly to me, like a horrible joke that someone created to give immortal creature's false hope and fear.

Hope for losing every trait or miniature detail that made them inhuman, every tiny trace that singled them out as beasts or abnormal. But while or special gifts and talents seemed to be fading away like human memories, our regular qualities that made us _extra _remained intact. In the sunlight, when the golden ray finally landed on the skin of my kind, the disgusting glow of trillions of infinitesimal beads of diamond like things burned brightly, its own shine only equal to that of the sun.

When steel or metal tried to penetrate the granite skin that we possess, it broke instantly upon impact. While we were losing the parts that made us unique, in a race that made us exactly alike, we were not losing the things that more then half of us wanted.

We still possessed the thirst for blood, the sleepless nights, a speed that was beyond measurable and the inability to die.

Still, however, while we kept everything which made us our own race, fear grew within our people. The fear of losing their coveted immortality. Most did not chose the existence of the undead, but there were those of us who did.

Mainly those types of undead were apart of the Volturi, they were among the elite, whose drive and passion for what they had became pushed them to become the best. They were the ones who feared what this unexplained mystery could lead to.

For the past two weeks, since my family and I had come to the Volturi, I had been trying to fit together the puzzle. From the wars and previous battle's I've experienced and been in, I thought it would be easier from then this.

I haven't been able to fit anything together, yet I'm sure I have most of the pieces.

Ninety-eight years ago Bella Swan killed herself. That is one thing I am absolutely positive of.

Almost a month ago, two weeks before Haziel came, the first sign of losing our abilities showed. From Haziel I also concluded that Victoria had eight people with talents that were further than extraordinary.

Somehow, days after we had placed Bella's body in the ground in the local Fork's symmetry, Victoria was able to raise Bella from the dead.

Then, without any of us smelling or catching on, she took Bella out of Forks and now has her hidden in some remote part of the world.

Haziel, who is in fact an _angel, _was sent down from heaven to aide us in our quest for Bella.

The Volturi has not been able to locate anything on Bella or Victoria. Aro has come to the conclusion that one of his old guards may be in lead with Victoria and two days ago he sent out Demetri and Felix to look into it. Roderick, the ex guard, was the one to report that Bella had been turned into a vampire.

After several attempts to understand how everything fit, I've decided that while I may know everything, I need to figure how why to understand.

Edward is currently pacing down stairs in a room opposite to the one that Esme and Carlisle were discussing random pieces of articles in an Italian magazine, Rosalie and Emmett were occupied with each other and Alice was flipping the pages of another ancient book.

The paper I was writing my thoughts down on was stained with wet ink and blotted with the black liquid. I barely felt the rough white paper beneath my fingers as I shredded it into pieces that could no longer be re put together again. My memory would never forget the words on them, so it didn't matter if I had the sheet or not.

"Jasper, love." Alice muttered, her eyes never leavings the pages. "Why don't you help me, look through the stack of books at the foot of our bed?"

Theories and folk lore were written dully in faded italic text on yellowed molded paper. Dirt and over two century's worth of filth and neglect hung possessively to the pages. I grimaced as I took in the smell of the first book. While Alice had long ago gotten use to the decaying smell of paper and clear glue, I could never be able to accept the smell as anything but rotten.

Several hours of useless reading resulted in my mind wandering to other things and I placed a thick volume of astronomy and the earth on a wooden carved table. While I could still read and think of either things and still be able to know if I came across something of value, my desire to be done with the boring processes became too much.

Alice didn't pay attention nor question me as I left the room, she was still entirely focused on finding Bella and nothing at this point would divert her from that path.

The gray stoned walls of the castle echoed the sound my footsteps created and I ignored the loud thump. It was courteous to be swift and light while walking down those particular types of halls but I didn't care. Days had passed since Aro had told us any news on the situation and I wanted an update.

Any sort of information about anything would be good at this point. My treck brought a lot of hissing from four floors below me. A few outspoken and elite members of the guard muttered furiously at me from the higher levels of the tower and I couldn't help but give a light smirk.

I was becoming someone entirely different while I stayed in the castle. At times I didn't notice it, but because of the lack of emotions I felt from people, I felt as if I was finally becoming myself.

I didn't have the influence of others traits and personalities and feelings on me, if someone was annoyed by what I was doing, I didn't have to immediately stop because I was annoyed to. True, I could have changed their annoyance, but I had still felt it. Now, without the extra pressure I believed myself free of every hold or sway over me.

With renewed vigor I quickened my pace and moved hastily down the halls toward Aro's meeting chamber.

From the lack of movement in the room I could tell that Aro was the only occupant in the room at the moment and knocked softly on the door.

It was unneeded; Aro knew that I was coming toward his room from twelve and a half steps away.

"Come in." Aro said, his voice as bright and light as he could have possibly made it. I entered the room and ignored the rest of my family's sudden silence.

I could still hear Alice flipping the pages of the book upstairs, but the rest of my family had stopped every motion, even Rosalie and Emmett, to listen into the conversation I was about to have.

While the double solid oak doors did prevent a lot of noise to come out, with our enhanced hearing it was still relatively easily to hear every word of our conversation on the floor below and above us. From the next to floors you had to strain to hear, but could usually make out a few words.

"Sorry about the lack of privacy," Aro apologized, "Normally a member of my guards and can a sound proof wall around all and any of my rooms, but as her powers are out…" he trailed off.

His brow furrowed and a small frown tugged at his thin mouth. With a quick jolt he moved himself into a better position and crossed his legs.

"What is it you need my dear boy?" Aro questioned. A large, wide smile overcame his face and a warm look entered into his eyes. I didn't believe the kindness that he was trying to express in his face.

From the little remaining ability that I had I could tell that he was not being sincere, I knew well enough not to believe in the false act of caring that he was putting on display.

"I've came for an update." I said quickly and as softly as my voice would allow me. Hopefully, Edward, who was the next floor up and now had joined Esme and Carlisle in their room, could not hear me.

"I see....but as I've already told you before, as soon as Felix and Demetri return I will know something." Aro answered patiently "And until then I have no knew knowledge on Bella or the loss of…"He stopped and cleared his throat.

"What is your real reason for coming here?" Aro questioned and raised a pale eyebrow. His eyes narrowed in on me as he tried to read my unchangeable expression. While I was slowly becoming someone else, I was still Jasper Whitlock, and I was still as impassive as ever.

"My only reason is to find Bella as soon as possible." I told him plainly, the lie floating from my mouth as easy as the venom I produced.

"I will not be taken for a fool." Aro lowered his eye brow, adopting a fierce look. His fingers glided along a polished and smooth looking object on his desk. He pressed a little too hardly and his finger imprinted along the unbreakable metal.

"Nor would I dare to do it, but I have no other reasons for coming here." I stated, rising slowly from my chair. Now would not be the time to say or ask of anything else.

He relaxed his features and leaned back into the hard high backed wooden chair. His black robe fluttered with a sudden draft and twirled around him in a sinister way as I opened the doors leading out.

"I'll take my leave no Aro," I bowed my head, showing respect. He nodded back at me and turned toward another object on his desk. The silver sheen reflecting the iridescent crimson luster in his eyes.

I entered the room with Alice merely a second and a half later. She looked up from a thin manuscript, her hands clutching the worn document in her hands tightly. She looked broken and torn.

Without words I understood immediately the importance of the item she held in her hands. I silently and quickly laid against the stoned floor of the room and whispered Edward's name as softly as I could.

The remaining members of my family were gathered and seated around Alice as soon as I had removed myself from off the floor.

Carlisle inclined his head forward, motioning for someone to explain.

Alice grabbed onto a piece of forgotten parchment and plucked an eraser less pencil from the ground. Her hands moved across the page for a fraction of a second and she only wrote one word.

_Werewolves. _

_

* * *

_

Thank you for everyone who stuck with this, I won't abandon this until it's done. Just try and be patient, don't forget to review because that's where I get my drive to write and I'll update as soon as I can.

It'll probably be in a few weeks, look around Febuary fourth. If I haven't gotten another one up by then, you can be sure that before March I'll have the next chapter done and posted.

Again, I'm sorry that I haven't uploaded sooner.


	10. good news, I suppose

YES! The story will continue.

To all those who have had me on your alert list for the past three years, I'm so sorry for being such a crappy updater.

I write, and write and write and most of the story is done.. But it's not fitting together. So I've taken months ignoring it, hoping it'll come together to post it for you all. It hasn't yet.

Therefore, I am editing everything. I've done the first three chapters, and wow. All I can say is that they feel like new chapters. Seriously, I don't think one word is the same.

GO READ THEM NOW!

The difference is staggering. I can't believe I wasn't Flammed daily for the horrendous writing of my pubescent self. Even now, when I feel so confident in my style and the ability to actually form correct setences-however rare they may be- I know that in another three/four years, I'll be shocked by this writing here.

Thank you to everyone reading this Authors note.

As I can't be held to any promise I make apparently, at least when it comes to updating in a regularly fashion, I must ask that you have faith in me.

The next chapter is complete. But I shall not post it until everything has been revised.

I'm looking for a beta reader, because I treated the wonderfully amazing one I had earlier like crap and never sent her something to fix. Honestly, I feel like I don't deserve one.

If anyone feels they can help my crazy musings and email me death threats when I've gone too long without updating, feel free to contact me! I'd love someone giving me a swift kick in the ass to keep me motivated.

Again, I can only say how extremely thankful I am to everyone who continues to read this story.

Feel free to email me with complaints about how long I'm taking. It will not annoy me, and I will not ignore it. I will read, reply and then, hopefully, update.

I know this has disappointed you, expecting another chapter.

But if you think about it, I've posted three chapters for you to read tonight, and that is more than I've written for Twilight all year!

If any of you are interested in Lily and James from Harry Potter, I must admit I am much more frequent in updating those stories, don't ask me why... I don't really know.

I hate giving a date, only to disappointing everyone when months pass by it and nothing new is written, but before the beginning of August, I'm hoping the chapters 4-7 will be edited and done.

Please, enjoy.


End file.
